Don’t Wreck Yourself

Don’t Wreck Yourself is a weekly podcast about finding truth on the internet. On each episode, we assess a claim wrecking the internet, answer questions nobody asked us, and keep you from ruining your life with bad information choices.

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Episodes

McDonald’s Eating Thots

Tuesday Feb 22, 2022

Tuesday Feb 22, 2022

On this episode, Matt and Ryan plow through some minor audio issues and dive into some political claims on Twitter, a service that will be remembered in the post apocalyptic wasteland as a precursor to Truth Social, the communication platform for mutants, degenerates, and other irradiated deplorables. Then, if you like stuffed crust you better put a ring on it, and that ring should be a 10 karat gold Pizza Hut Excellence ring. Next, they look into interesting facts surrounding the planned obsolescence of the International Space Station, and finally they fact check a medical claim about the color of Vegan baby batter.Check out our friends at 1911 BYOB @1911_phl on InstragramFind us @wreckyourpod on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and TikTokChat with us on the CastJunkie Discord... https://discord.gg/z5GMvpmyTZ 

Sasquatch Forked My Toilet!

Tuesday Feb 15, 2022

Tuesday Feb 15, 2022

A listener thinks they solved an internet mystery better than we did. Yeah right. As if. Everyone knows it was a tie. Then they try to convince a misguided reddit user that blue whales are the biggest animal to ever live. Then they delve into a ripped from the headlines true crime theory from the r/conspiracy that brings allegations against aliens, cannibals, and a heavily medicated sasquatch in the murder of Gabby Petito. Next they discuss a Russian boy genius who claims to be a messenger from Mars. Then they ask you to stay on the edge of your seat for the final question in which the guys dispense practical plumbing advice to a redditor with toilet troubles.We are @wreckyourpod on Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and Twitter.Find our channel on the CastJunkie Discord Server: https://discord.gg/z5GMvpmyTZ

Tuesday Feb 08, 2022

Ryan drags Matt into a dumb conversation on Twitter about the Keystone XL pipeline's relationship with inflated gas prices. Then they dream up solutions for a young man in a terrible conundrum that could end with his nasty bits being showed all over the internet. Then they open up a can of marital worms when they take on an r/amitheasshole post about a husband caught getting smoochie in public with someone who was not his wife. Finally, they take the queen to task on the eve of her platinum jubilee for underpaying her new housekeeper.Find the guys @wreckyourpod on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, TikTok, and on gmail.They can also be found on the CastJunkie Discord server. https://discord.gg/6wCKyq5ttn

Tuesday Feb 01, 2022

The first rule of Dinosaur Nipple Butter Gun Club is Don't Wreck Yourself. Admittedly, this one gets weird. Matt and Ryan open up the show discussing a post from r/randomthoughts about dinosaur milk and all the anatomy that implies, before moving onto a surprising east coast/west coast beef right out of Dr. Seuss's Butter Battle Book. They go on to discuss the Chinese government's new ending to the cult classic Fight Club, and then wrap up the episode verifying a listener submitted topic about a man who used to have a golden gun. Mostly they talk about the primary and secondary sexual features of duck-billed hadrosaurs. Find us @wreckyourpod on Social Media: Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and on gmail.You can also locate us on the CastJunkie discord server, chatting about the show and geeking out about our fellow podcasters.https://discord.gg/z5GMvpmyTZ

Tuesday Jan 25, 2022

Ryan and Matt star in the sequel to Shazam (the app, not the best film in the DCU franchise). Then they get into strange rumor lying at the intersection of Leonardo DiCaprio's two great loves: old school sci-fi fantasy, and women in their early 20's. Next Ryan brings everything down with gun violence statistics, and Matt saves the day by bringing up the Israel-Palestine conflict... but like, in a fun way. No seriously, there's a murder, but also in a fun way. Trust us, it will be okay. Then they finish the show by giving sound, well-seasoned career advice to all the quitters out there.@wreckyourpod on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and gmail.Chat with us on the CastJunkie Discord server:  https://discord.gg/z5GMvpmyTZ

Silverback to the Future

Tuesday Jan 18, 2022

Tuesday Jan 18, 2022

Technical problems create an open loop in the timestream as Matt and Ryan take on a tale from a Victorian era legal dispute that proves your rights end at the tip of your nose... even if your nose has been bitten off and spit onto the floor. Then they discuss a viral image that lives at the intersection of privacy and public health, and then they squeeze in a r/nostupidquestions topic about who is the top banana in the primate fight club. Then disaster strikes, and from the ashes (sic?) emerges an edgy corporate tweet from PBR encouraging their customers to get into a whole new kind of can during Dry January.Find us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and gmail: @wreckyourpodChat with us on the Cast Junkie Discord server: https://discord.gg/6wCKyq5ttn

20/20 Deuces!

Tuesday Jan 11, 2022

Tuesday Jan 11, 2022

It's 2022, and Matt and Ryan are jumping into the New Year! They open up with a recap of what you missed in their absence, and they affirm their unwavering loyalty to the ravenous content eating monster that lives at the center of the internet. Then they discuss the evolutionary advantages of humanity's end to end flavor sensors. Finally, they skirt the philosophical debate around an analogy they found on the eternal battlefield of the YouTube religious turf war. Welcome back! Happy New Year!@wreckyourpod on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and RedditChat with us on the CastJunkie Discord Server: https://discord.gg/jh6Q8VMspy

Wreck the Halls

Friday Dec 24, 2021

Friday Dec 24, 2021

Matt and Ryan are joined by Rick Reynolds to talk holiday shop as they form a tribunal to determine whether a Redditor from r/aita is the villain in a family Christmas drama. Then Matt and Ryan discuss what a young man with no holiday plans can do when family and friends are not an option. Following that, they give you a map lesson that starts with a question from Reddit's Explain It Like I'm Five subreddit. Then they take on an image showing a lady Krampus, and then they address another Grinchly figure crying war crimes in the war on Christmas.Find us on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and gmail @wreckyourpodFind us on the CastJunkie Discord Server: https://discord.gg/z5GMvpmyTZ

The Worst MRE

Tuesday Dec 14, 2021

Tuesday Dec 14, 2021

In this week's episode, Matt and Ryan help a Redditor break up with their long term significant other, tell you how to talk to women, and discuss a mysterious administrative disciplinary form from the Army that cropped up online in which a foreign government is invited to eat America's .Find us on Instagram, Tiktok, Facebook, Twitter and Gmail @wreckyourpodChat with us on Discord at https://discord.gg/6wCKyq5ttn

Tuesday Dec 07, 2021

Matt and Ryan discuss the merits of real estate advice from the Illegal Pro Life Tips subreddit on Reddit before diving into a question about whether it is safe to perform self-love in a world of horny spirits. They then dive into the sordid tale involving a chimney sweep imposter and Queen Victoria's skivvies, before cackling with some foul mouthed avians causing a dust up at a sanctuary in England.Find us @wreckyourpod on Twitter, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, and gmail.Find us on the CastJunkie server on Discord. https://discord.gg/jh6Q8VMspy

The Horse in Room Six

Tuesday Nov 30, 2021

Tuesday Nov 30, 2021

Matt and Ryan are joined by Kalea from The Whores in Room Six podcast to answer all the internet's questions. Our helpful trio first answers a query from r/nostupidquestions about female anatomy. Then they discuss an image from the internet warning the perpetrator behind a string of heinous bell pepper related crimes of a coming divine retribution. Then Kalea presents the sad but true fate of Chattanooga Tennessee's Swingers Tiki Palace. Then they finish off a few horses related topics in a final race to the end of the episode.Join us on the Cast Junkie Discord Server here...https://discord.gg/jh6Q8VMspyAnd find us on Gmail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and TikTok @wreckyourpod

Oops! All Reddit Part Deuces

Tuesday Nov 23, 2021

Tuesday Nov 23, 2021

In this episode, Matt and Ryan fly by the seat of their pants answering a series of rapid fire Reddit questions about parenting, animals, electric car charging stations, wicca and other things they are grossly underqualified to discuss. Gone is the veneer of research, replaced with the hubris of bravado!Come see us on the Castjunkie Discord server...https://discord.gg/jh6Q8VMspyOr on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook @wreckyourpod

Tuesday Nov 16, 2021

In this episode, Ryan and Matt get schooled by some smart listeners when they revisit their mistakes. Then they teach a short networking seminar about how to meet the scrappiest entrepreneurs in your neighborhood: drug dealers! Next they fact check a meme claiming that someone in 1882 actually did invent a better mousetrap: a gun. They also break down why you can't buy white laser pointers  in language so simple that a five year old can understand (or someone from the "explain it like I'm five" subreddit at r/eli5), and lastly Matt looks into claims touting a healthy vegan alternative to consuming human flesh! Come chat with us on Discord...https://discord.gg/6wCKyq5ttnOr search for us on Twitter, Instagram, and (Yuck) Facebook, where we are @wreckyourpod

Khaaaaan!

Tuesday Nov 09, 2021

Tuesday Nov 09, 2021

In this episode Matt and Ryan discuss a question from r/nostupidquestions about what to do when someone poops on you like a pigeon. Like, if they were a pigeon. Nobody poops on pigeons. There's a pecking order. Then they discuss a listener submitted claim regarding the possibility that the Ghost of Genghis Kahn might be preparing to declare World War 3 from the afterlife. Then they finish up by choosing a species to finish off when they answer another r/nostupidquestions inquiry. Also, content warning: Genghis Khan used to be a huge piece of, and this episode does acknowledge his pattern of sexual assault.Join us on the CastJunkie Discord Server:https://discord.gg/6wCKyq5ttn

Don’t Spook Yourself

Friday Oct 29, 2021

Friday Oct 29, 2021

In this special Halloween episode, Matt and Ryan are joined by Cap from the podcast Shrimp and Crits. They take on a variety of terrifying topics, including ghosts, vampires, werewolves, zombies, pregnancy, and the end user license agreement for one of Amazon's software solutions. Are you terrified yet? While discussing whether there are ghost seamen in vampire balls, they hold flashlights under their faces to increase the spook factor. How about now?CREDITS FOR SHOW NOTES"Thunder, Very Close, Rain, A.wav" by InspectorJ (www.jshaw.co.uk) of Freesound.org"Thunder, Very Close, No Rain, C.wav" by InspectorJ (www.jshaw.co.uk) of Freesound.org"Thunderstorm_003_Minus1db.mp3" by Algaeman of Freesound.org"footsteps-squeeky-wood.aiff" by tmkappeltn of Freesound.org"knakande-dorr" by ryding of Freesound.org"creaking-door" by fuzzpapi of Freesound.org"knakande-dorr" by ryding of Freesound.org"door-pounding-increasing-intensity" by jhumbucker of Freesound.org"poof-of-smoke" by planman of Freesound.org"doorknob-rattle-2" by castironcarousel of Freesound.org"button-05" by jarredgibb of Freesound.org"2-beating-of-wings" by miguelab1998 of Freesound.org"duskwolf" by killyourpepe of Freesound.org"Songs and Csardas" performed by Emery Deutch and his Gypsy Orchestra (Recorded 1949) retrieved October 2021 from https://archive.org/details/78_as-a-bud-blossoms-to-a-rose-asszony-lesz-a-lanybol_emery-deutsch-and-his-gypsy-or_gbia0020274

Ketchup and Grab Some Kinks

Tuesday Oct 19, 2021

Tuesday Oct 19, 2021

Matt and Ryan examine Hooters' new uniform policy and find it comes up short on fighting patriarchal exploitation of female sexuality to sell dead animal parts dipped in hot sauce. Then they take on a pair of ketchup related question, the first makes you think, the second make you want a drink. There are two types of people in this world, ketchup fans and not-ketchup fans, and you'll walk away from this episode knowing once and for all who you are. Finally, Matt and Ryan investigate a missing fetish report from r/nostupidquestions on Reddit, scouring the internet for some lost kink to prove the infallibility of Rule #34... destroying Matt's browser history in the process.

Tuesday Oct 12, 2021

Matt and Ryan reminisce about Bostonians they've known before diving into a claim that eating a veggie burger will send you right through a Biblical loophole to . Then they stalk silently through the shadows, emerging to strike when least expected with the truth about a recent ninja attack against US soldiers. From there, they judge whether the eviction of unwanted and unhoused guests is an move when they take on an r/aita inquiry. Finally, they slip into something a little more comfortable--like a NASA jumpsuit--as they try to answer an r/nostupidquestions thread about whether there are zero G spots in Zero  G... which is to say, whether anyone on the ISS has ever fed the space ducks.  Find us at @wreckyourpod on IG, Twitter, TikTok and on Facebook.

Don’t Rick Yourself

Tuesday Oct 05, 2021

Tuesday Oct 05, 2021

Rick Reynolds joins Matt and Ryan to solve the internet. They discuss all the movie set dressing you can stuff up your nose answering an r/nostupidquestions query. Then Rick explains how to use the term "fair dinkum", and does a fair dinkum job of it. Then they talk about a lady who sparked a massive wildfire while boiling bear urine. Then, as a final affirmation of Rick's sanity, he is asked to defend the very existence of his homeland against allegations of non-existence. This one is high stakes.Check out Rick on Instagram: @rickreynolds

Tuesday Sep 28, 2021

In this episode, Matt and Ryan cut to the core of a user submitted question about a beach where chainsaws are expressly forbidden. Then they answer a question from r/nostupidquestions about simulation theory. Then they go deep inside of an image of a mysterious statue making the rounds on social media, weirdly dissecting a Disney classic unprompted. Finally, they round out the episode with another r/nostupidquestions generated inquiry regarding the status of manmade islands under international law.

The Gordian Forget Me Not

Tuesday Sep 21, 2021

Tuesday Sep 21, 2021

On this week's episode, Matt and Ryan celebrate a minor production milestone: six months of podcasting. Then they help the desperate souls of Reddit by tackling their most challenging r/nostupidquestions question yet in which the asker would like to become less stupid. Then they plug into a Black Mirroresque story out of the UK that is too graphic and horrible to describe with any level of anatomical precision. They turn their attention to the font of very much not stupid questions again, but this time the question asker is inquiring about what happens when you put a grenade in a microwave, and we answer the question because we don't think anyone is smart enough to decode what we want. Finally, and possibly forever, they discuss meme reports about QR codes going up on Japanese gravestones.

2021 Don’t Wreck Yourself

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